Believe

In Dubai, getting ready for flight to JFK

2009-08-21T17:28:00.000-04:00

Pray for Nati's flight, the first flight was rough. See u all soon.

He is with us now

2009-08-18T09:44:00.000-04:00

Well, we picked him up today and brought him to the place we are
staying. It was very emotional to see the nannies say good bye, their
job must be so hard. Today I pray that these ladies would be blessed
by God and know that the Lord is pleased with their incredible
service. Thanks for all of your prayers and support.

We met him!

2009-08-17T12:27:00.000-04:00

Today we met Nati and he is awesome, he will fit right in with the
rest of us. We got to spend about two hours playing and trying to coax
a smile. The biggest hit for Nati was the cell phone Lucy packed for
him. He knew how to use it and everything. It was very special to be
with the other seven families as the spent their first moments with
their new kids. We had to leave him at the transition home tonight,
but tomorrow we get to bring him back to our room. We continue to pray
for God to lead our journey, He has been so good. Goodbye for now.

So it begins . . .

2009-08-16T06:34:00.000-04:00

We landed about 2 hours ago. We are safe and sound at the Yasabi guest
house. We are slowly meeting the other families on the trip. ET is
chilly. Well that is about it for now. Remembering to leave the
expectations and let God take us on this journey. To God be the glory!

Sent from WiPhone

Africa here we come!

2009-08-15T23:48:00.000-04:00

Well we just finished our time in Dubai. It was fun and hotttttttt!
Like 105. we did some fun stuff, including a city tour and a desert
safari. We are just about to board our flight to Ethiopia. Excitement
is very high. Pray for our hearts to be centered on the Lord and to
lose our expectations of what the next week might or might not be
like. Much love to you all! Next stop Africa.

Dubai has met the Stackler's

2009-08-14T00:50:00.000-04:00

So, the first leg of the journey is in the books. We landed about an
hour ago in Dubai. The flight was long, but pretty good. I think I
watched six movies. They served a lot of food and neither of us slept
very much. We are presently waiting for a shuttle to our hotel. We are
hoping for an early check-in. Talk to everyone later.

2009-08-13T00:05:00.001-04:00

We are in the car headed toward NYC for the night. Flying out in the morning. Packing was an adventure, we are hoping for a little grace from the airline. Anyway, we are excited to finally be taking these steps toward our son. We will try to keep updating as long as we have access to a signal.

It's Official - Meet Nathnael William Stackler

2009-07-28T22:13:00.017-04:00

We got the call today, we had a successful court date and Nathnael William Stackler is legally part of the Stackler family. He has long been in our hearts, but it sure does feel good to clear this legal hurdle. We are now scheduled to travel to Ethiopia to pick him up on August 15th. This is a little up in the air right now, so keep praying.

Here are a few pictures of our son.

Here is a video we put together to tell a little about our journey to Nathnael.

Another Bump

2009-07-22T15:03:00.002-04:00

Well, I guess it would have been too easy to just wait for next Monday and get the good news about passing court. Apparently there was some miscommunication regarding our court date. The Ethiopian court has our court date as July 29th and not July 27th. So we will have to wait an extra two days. Still waiting with hopeful hearts.

While I'm Waiting . . .

2009-07-16T14:16:00.002-04:00

Well, it has been an insanely long time since we have written, mostly due to laziness, but also due to the difficulty of processing all that is going on. The last time we updated everyone on the status of our adoption, we had a court date on May 20th. A couple of weeks prior to our court date we heard from our agency that cases like ours were not being heard by the Ethiopian court due to an investigation. The investigation was not directly about our agency or our son. Unfortunately, when our court date came around on May 20th, the Ethiopian court closed our case (and all others like ours) until the investigation was completed. This news was very difficult to take and I think that Amy and I pretty much went into shutdown mode.

We were told by many people about the ups and downs of the adoption process and how things will never go how you think they will go. I naively thought our case would be different and, quite simply, I was wrong.

The investigation eventually came to an end around the beginning of July (I think). We got another court date for July 13th. Then we heard that another government agency in Ethiopia was having training for a couple of weeks and could not perform their part of the court proceedings. They will not be returning to work until July 24th. So, on the 13th we got another court date. This time our court date is July 27th. This is the first time that we have had a court date with a chance of passing. I am not holding my breath, but I am hopeful.

I am learning so much about God in this process and they are not easy lessons, but they are lessons that I am better off for learning.

While all of this is going on, life has continued at its normal pace. Lucy and Sam are enjoying vacation bible school, Amy and the kids went to Savannah and Raleigh for vacation (I had to work), Sam started Cub Scouts, we got a sandbox, we got new carpet, Sam went to camp at The Marsh. Life has been fun this summer and I have had a great time with my family, but I have definitely felt those parts of our family that are missing.

I love being a father and right now my heart just wants our son to be home with us.

Take a peek back on the 27th. If we pass court, I will post a collection of pictures and you can be introduced to our newest son. To God be the Glory!

Easter

2009-04-12T22:26:00.002-04:00

Nine AWAA families are in ET right now. They will return on Saturday with their new children. One family, The Luncefords, just posted on their blog. I read it and cried. What a wonderful taste of ET. I can't wait.

A Benefit Show, Court News and Go TERPS!

2009-03-19T16:54:00.005-04:00

Last Friday night, our good friend Sean put together a benefit show for us. We were expecting a good time with friends and good music. Our goal for the evening was around 600 hundred dollars . . .We were totally blown away by the generosity of everybody. The show raised enough money to cover all of our air fare! (If you want to know the whole amount ask one of us) It is funny, every time I doubt what we are doing God shows me His approval in a big way. As Bob, one of our awesome Elders says to me with all certainty, "Amy, you are doing the right thing." (Bob rocks on so many levels.)

On a different note. We received word yesterday that we will not get a new court date(CD) in April. It was really tough news as all of the families before us received new earlier court dates. I was really banking on court moving to April. I was pretty upset about this turn of events. Sometimes things seem so random. The other part that really stings is that families that received a referral after us will get a CD before us. I would like to add that I am really happy for these families since they are dear friends from our Yahoo Group.

As the end of March draws near we will be receiving an update on on Natty-boy. I can't wait to share with you all his progress. I miss him.

William would like for me to add . . . "Go Terps." They just won something or other.

Personally, I am a die hard Seahawks fan. Go Seahawks!

The Date

2009-03-01T14:59:00.003-05:00

This will be a really short up date. It is getting ready to snow and there is NO FOOD in our house so I am off to brave the harsh reality of poor planning. . .

We got news this week that our court date in ET is going to be May 20. Lots of good things happen in May, we are praying that N-man becoming our son will be one of them. If we do pass court we will be traveling to ET in June. I am so excited to spend the summer with our new son, there will be some serious family bonding going on.

Well I am off to the store, hopefully there is food left.

We got THE call!!

2009-02-10T23:04:00.002-05:00

What a day! So here is the story.

I really didn't think that today would be THE DAY, but the Lord knew, and looking back He
was taking care of me. I was in the basement working out, which NEVER happens in the
morning, and after wards I went to take a shower. I am pretty much deaf and decided to
take the phone into the bathroom with me, "Just in case." I really thought that it was silly.
Well, right when I had shampoo in my hair the phone rang and I took my time to answer
it. But my silly 3 year old got to it first, so I couldn't see the caller id. So there I am,
dripping wet, with shampoo in my hair answering the phone.

I hear the 3 year old talking about a shower and then I hear laughing. I said, "Hello?" and
a woman said, " Hi Amy, this is Terra with your referral call." And I screamed, " I am naked. I
mean, I am in the shower and naked." I think that she thought I was drinking or
something. I wasn't. So we got all of the info . ..

HE IS AMAZING!!! Sweet, soft curls and big, brown eyes. Around 18 months old.

Here is the cool thing about the shower part. (Just don't think of me naked) Almost eight years ago, I was pretty sick when we had our first son, Sam, and my Ob called, I was in the shower, to tell me to go to the hospital to be induced at 32 weeks. Pretty scary. The other thing. Our six month old, Georgia, was in the shower with me when she died on Easter morning 2004. It was a nightmare.

How good is our God that he would give us our new son while I was in the shower?

Our friend, Corin, wrote a song and sang it at Georgia's memorial service. One
of the lines is, "Believe, that joy will come from sorrow." That is what the Lord does for us
every day. I am so humbled.

Amy

Putting Sam to bed

2009-01-05T22:51:00.004-05:00

Over the Christmas break Sam was looking at the waiting child list with me. I can't give you too much details, but there was a child that caught his eye. Here is our conversation that followed:

Sam: He is like me.

Me: Yea, he is a bit older than you.

Sam: So he doesn't have a family?

Me: Not anymore.

Sam: That is really sad. It would be cool if we could be his family.

Me: Yeah? Well then would would be a little brother. What do you think of that?

Sam: I wouldn't like it. (Thinking some more) Well, if he really needs a family I could like it.

A few days later, after the wildness of Christmas, I was putting Sam to bed and he prayed, unprompted, for this little child to have new family. That is my prayer too.

My heart breaks.

What is a ________?

2009-01-05T21:07:00.004-05:00

Over the summer we were invited to a wedding in Maine. (Hi Kouba's!) It was there that we met another family who had adopted a little girl from Russia. She is about the same age as Sam. When we found out that this couple had been through the adoption journey William and I both sat back and relaxed. For once we didn't have to explain our million and one reasons to adopt, and we didn't have to define every adoption term that there is. The four of us just talked knowing that our hearts were in the same place. It was really nice.

My best friend, Erin, is another person that I can talk too without catching her up to speed. I can just say, "Still waiting. . . " and she replies, "Us too . . ." Our hearts know what we are waiting for. It was her first adoption that taught me what a Dossier was, I hope that I caught on pretty quick.

So when I am talking to you and I start to speak another language this little lesson will help you to understand what I am saying. Please memorize there will be a test.

Home study- Is when a social worker comes into your home, and life, and interviews you, and some of your friends, to see if you are fit to become parent. There are usually four visits for a home study. We actually like to talk about ourselves so this portion was fun for us. Except for the part when Sam kept talking about getting sp*nked. Which up until that point he hadn't been sp*nked in years.

Dossier - A pile of paper work that shows Ethiopia that we meet their requirements to adopt one of their precious children. Seriously, it is a huge three ring binder filled with documents that proves we aren't criminals, we can drive safely, that our home is sanitary, that a fire marshall has approved our home for habitation, and our water is safe to drink. It also contains our Home study and other important documents from our agency. If you know us well, you will know the fact that we have all of these papers in a three ring binder and that we know where that binder is at all times, is an amazing thing. We found our passports in a random box in the basement. We are not the most "together" people in the world. I really have to credit William with putting everything together. He carried the paper pregnancy.

DTE- Date or Dossier To Ethiopia: As of right now this is the most important thing. This is the date that our paper work went to ET. Our DTE is 5/2/08. It is sorta like a due date, no more like a conception date. 7-9 months after 5/2/08 we will have a baby . . . sorta. The DTE is also how our agency keeps track of who is next in line to get a Referral. The last family that received a referral has a DTE of 4-4-08! We are getting so close!

Referral- When you are matched with a child. Unlike most countries, this is done by our agency. We either accept or reject they referral. It is unlikely that we would reject a referral since our agency already knows what we are requesting in a child. They would give us a child that has special needs if we didn't ask. That is not to say that special needs wouldn't turn up later.

Court Date - The day that our case will appear before a judge in ET to determine if the child is legally ours. About 30% of people fail court. It is usually because ET is so adamant about making sure that the child is a true orphan and the paper work submitted didn't match up. Which is really good, but really hard to endure from this end. Our friends the Kulps are going through this right now.

MOWA - Ministry of Wom*n affairs. They are the ET agency that controls orphans affairs. They must approve us for the adoption before we pass court.

TTD- Provided that we pass court our date to travel is set 2-3 weeks after our court date.

AWAA- America World Adoption Association. Our agency.

So there it is, well most of it.

The Promise of a New Year

2009-01-03T19:45:00.004-05:00

Well, it is a new year and unless there is a serious delay, this will be the year that we welcome a new child into our family. Things have been very slow on the adoption front for the past six weeks or so, but the new year brings hope and much expectation. I have been reminded over the past week or two about how much God is in control and how life’s challenges and roadblocks are not surprises to Him. We will be doing our best to put our trust in Him over the next couple of months as we get closer to bringing our child home.

As of right now we are around #20 in line, but there may be some surprise families waiting in front of us. Our agency does not officially tell us where we are in line, so our best guess comes from the Yahoo Group we belong to that is made up of other waiting families.

Please pray for our patience. I am really looking forward to focusing on all of the other things that God wants us to do before our child comes home. I am obviously also very excited about our trip to Africa and how our life will be different after we get home.

Peace in My Heart

2008-12-21T19:57:00.002-05:00

Christmas is such an amazing time of the year. I like the presents and the family gatherings just as much as the next guy (okay, I actually probably like them slightly less), but I love the idea of God coming to earth as a child.

Today at church, my pastor delivered a message that talked about why God would make the decision to send His son to earth. The answer - relationship! God desires relationship and he will do (and has done) whatever it takes to allow it to happen.

I am excited to have that relationship and allow God to fill my heart with peace. I do not think there is anything that can replace or add to the peace that God can provide.

I pray that the Christmas season is filled with peace for you!

About Our Adoption

2008-12-16T22:12:00.002-05:00

Amy and I started this blog with the intention of keeping interested parties up to date on our adoption and our life in general. We, as in many areas of our life, have fallen dreadfully short of our intention. For this we apologize, but we are going to make an effort to change this pattern and give more regular updates. I thought I would start with some basics about our family and why we are adopting.

Amy and I have been married for about ten years. We have three children (Samuel (7), Georgia (would be 5), and Lucy (3)). Georgia passed away when she was six months old of a rare heart condition that we did not find out about until she had died. Obviously this has been very difficult for our family, but ultimately God has carried us through and we continue to trust in Him for our future.

Amy and I have always talked about adoption and after Lucy was born we knew it was our time to pursue it. We decided on America World Adoption (awaa.org) and we then decided to adopt from Ethiopia.

We submitted our application on October 30, 2007. Our completed paperwork was shipped to Ethiopia on May 2, 2008. This date is referred to as our DTE (documents to Ethiopia). We are now in the process of waiting for a referral. A referral is when we (the adoptive family) are matched up with an orphan. We expect a referral in the first couple of months of 2009. After we receive the referral, we will travel to be united with our new child in about 6-8 weeks. During this wait, our case will be taken to court where a judge will officially okay our adoption.

Amy and I have requested a child 18 months or younger. We did not specify whether we preferred a boy or a girl. It is likely that we will be matched with a boy since there are so many requests for girls in the adoption world.

This is a basic snapshot of where we are as of today. We will be providing another update before too long, so stay tuned and have a great week!

Lucy Turns Three

2008-11-12T13:32:00.006-05:00

Winter is over, Spring has arrived! These were the words spoken over Lucy on the day that she was dedicated in Church. She really is our spring. Our Crocus, that pushes up through the snow, to let us know that Hope is here. She is named for Lucy of Narnia. Faithful, hopeful, and believing. I pray that it is true.
Her Tantie, Erica, made the cake, pink of course.

This was Lucy's first real birthday party! I don't know who was more excited about it, her or me. Lucy has been planning it since July, anything Princess she has wanted to buy for her party. She has had the menu planned for some time: Pizza (from Romas), Chips, Apples, Pink Cake, Ice Cream and Pink Lemonade.

Sam was excited too as most of Lucy's friends have older siblings that he plays with. He made me promise that I wouldn't make him play any "pink girly" games, like pin the head on the Princess. Sam's crew hung out in the basement.

I was really pleased how the Party Room turned out. I wish that I had a close up picture of the table cloth, I wrapped the table in brown paper and then painted hearts, flowers and other shapes on it. I also used wrapping paper as a runner. As for the pink flowers hanging from overhead, I have been looking for an excuse to buy them for sometime!
We are so blessed to have a best friend, Darrell, who is an amazing Photographer. These are just a few of the pictures that he took.

On the Soap Box

2008-10-24T14:01:00.004-04:00

World Orphans is a great web site that gives a break down to how many orphans are in the world. 143 million! That is half of the people in the United States, what if one out of every two persons in the US was a child living on the streets? Not only that, they people living on the streets are under the age of 15! I think that would be the biggest issue in this political campaign that is raging around us. I recently watched the Saddleback interviews and both candidate's were surprised by the amount of orphans worldwide, one of the candidate's even has an adopted daughter. Neither one had a clear idea what to do about it. Why isn't this an issue? Why don't we think about, "the least of these"?

A Happy Day Forever

2008-10-02T14:45:00.001-04:00

We still miss you, sweetest peach.

Be Still . . .

2008-09-29T18:44:00.014-04:00

We are more than overdue for an update, so here goes -

As far as the adoption goes, we are in the same spot as we were previously. We are waiting. We will complete our fifth month of waiting on Thursday. We are anticipating a referral (when they match us up with our child) before the end of the year. With that being said, we really don't know and have decided that trusting God and not worrying about it is our best course of action. Just for your information, we would probably travel to get our child about 8 to 12 weeks after the referral.

It has not been hard waiting thus far, I think that it is just easier to go about living and let the details of the adoption play out as the Lord sees fit. We have learned that expectation is a dangerous thing when it comes to children and most other matters.

One of the things that has kept us busy in the recent weeks is our children. Samuel and Lucy have a great deal of energy and they are so much fun. Unbelievably, Samuel is now in the second month of second grade and Lucy attended her first day of practice pre-school.

Amy and I are learning more and more about being married. I have fallen more in love with Amy and continue to be inspired by the Jesus that I see in her. Life is not perfect, but there is no doubting that God knew what he was doing when he gave me this wonderful woman.

We are also pretty excited about an event coming up at Glorious Presence Church to benefit the adoption. Sean Ponte is pulling this event together and we are hoping for a cool evening on November 1st. There will be more to come on this benefit concert and there will also be some other ways to help us out with the adoption this fall and winter. Stay tuned.

Handsome Sam Python (this is the on-line name that his cousins gave him)

2008-08-31T22:16:00.015-04:00

Today our boy turned 7! I can't believe it on two levels: 1. That I am old enough to have a 7 year-old, and 2. That Sam is 7. I know that it is cliche to say that it seems like yesterday we were bringing home a scrawny little baby. As you can see, he really was scrawny. At the time of his birth I really thought the birth of a premature child was the worst experience that I would ever go through. In hind sight, I know that the Lord was just using the birth of our son to prepare me for a bigger battle. The Lord also knew that Sam would be the reason for us to get out of bed in the morning. That when nothing seemed right, he would be our purpose to continue, to move forward.

There are so many amazing qualities about Sam. He is really funny and smart. The other day when he got home from school, he looked at me and said, "Today was a great day!" I said, "Why?" Sam replied, "We had 2 and half hours of MATH!" I was a bit lost. I am more on the language side of learning, like poetry and not concrete answers don't really feel right to me. So, I mustered up the courage to say, "That IS awesome, bud!" Sam then walked forward and said to the world, "I love numbers!" This, I am sure, is directly related to the genenic influence of his father, he too is a number nerd.

Sam also loves being around people. One of my favorite interactions to watch is between Sam and our friend Asher. Asher isn't really a touchy, snugly person and Sam is. Sam will sit next to Asher at lunch touching, picking,rubbing, and hugging on Asher and Asher, is really nice and kind, he just keeps inching down the booth until he is pinned between Sam and the wall. I am sure that Asher is counting down the lunches until he is off serving the world. Asher, Sam loves you.

The best quality about Sam is his ability to speak the truth about things. He talks about Georgia going to heaven in a way that speaks truth and brings comfort. Shortly after Georgia died, he said to me, "Sissy likes heaven." He was only 2 and a half, and we didn't really explain heaven at that point. He just knew. At the time that we lost her, I prayed that the Lord would explain to Sam everything that we fell short on, and He did. I am not a mystic, but the things that Sam knew, or saw, were right on. Sam still speaks truth to people, he does it in away that is sweet and not judgemental. I pray that he will always be this way.

I am so excited to watch Sam grow up into the man that he was created to be. He is pretty awesome.

The Joner Family

2008-08-20T23:05:00.002-04:00

Please pray for a family in our ET program. They just got news today that their little baby girl died. They have never met her, or held her, or kissed her. I know that their hearts are broken. There has been a bad respitory infection that has been traveling around the orphange that the children are in. Please pray for the health of everybody there.

Many Long Days

2008-08-20T20:11:00.002-04:00

Amy and I went to Maine this past weekend for a wedding and some quality alone time. Maine is a gorgeous place, but even more remarkable for me was how incapable I was of feeling stress. Just removing myself from my daily life was awesome. It was eye-opening really. I have often considered the level of stress that I have on a daily basis as expected, but this weekend reminded me that it does not have to be that way. I had so much fun with Amy and really enjoyed the lack of responsibility, even if only for three days.

So, where does this leave me? Living for vacation and the dream of a stressless week? I hope that is not my only hope and it is not. The 'trick' is to find that stressless state in the middle of my everyday life, I believe this is the concept the bible likes to refer to as 'peace'. I am not really that good at finding this 'peace' and I know that it is something that God wants for me and for you.

I have concluded that to gain 'peace', I must either rid myself of every responsibility or cast my worry and stress on some other thing. Sounds like exactly the role that Jesus wants to play in our lives. Now, I just need to let Him carry my burdens and stop picking them back up for myself.

As far as the adoption goes, Amy and I figure we are about half way through our wait. We have waited about four months and it should be another four or five. It really does not seem that bad so far, but I am getting really excited about meeting the one God has given to us.

Be the Center

2008-08-05T21:16:00.003-04:00

So, we sang this song in church on Sunday. That's it. Nothing else to say except may it be so.

A Good Man Has Gone Home.

2008-08-02T10:20:00.009-04:00

Last week I had the honor of speaking at my grandfathers funeral. My Aunt told me that I was the only one that could do it, so I didn't have a choice. I wanted to speak. I wanted people to see the fullness of my grandfathers love for his family, friends, and God. He was a good man. The last few weeks of his life were full of suffering. Pa couldn't walk, hear and at the very end he was completely blind. Here is what I wrote for the eulogy. Please remember that I spoke this, it wasn't written to be reading material.

Malachi 4:2
“But for you who fear My name the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings; and you will go forth and skip about like calves from the stall.”

How can I sum up in a few minutes a man who lived for 88 years? It would be a lot easier if he hadn’t been so extraordinary. You couldn’t be in the same room with my Pa and not know that he was a man of great character and a man of deep faith. He didn’t do something because it was easy he did it because it was right. Pa did what was right not out of his own choosing, but because he followed Christ example.

The love that Pa had for Granny was tangible. A few years ago, probably close to 10, there was a snowstorm Pa was outside shoveling the snow and he knocked on the window to get Granny’s attention, when she looked outside she saw a message he had written to her in the snow it said, “I Heart You.” Our family is so proud of their marriage. They just celebrated their 66th wedding anniversary. What a victory! Their marriage is a shining example of how God intended a marriage to be.

My grandfather was the father to two children, Richard and Judy. The love he had for them was an amazing gift. He watched his son, my dad, go to war and thankfully come home. I know that he was praying fervently for my dad’s safety. Pa also stood by my Aunt as she battled her own war over cancer. I am certain that at times it was his prayers that helped her to fight and win. He instilled in his children a faith that will last for generations to come.
Pa wasn’t the typical father-in-law either. He quickly became a dad to my mom, Alice, and to my Uncle Howard. He knew that these two people made his family complete.

Pa was a friend to everybody. He had friendships that lasted the test of time. He corresponded regularly with his war-time friends and kept in touch with old church friends. The friendships he had became more evident this week as people from his work called the house and old neighbors sent cards. It didn’t matter who you were Pa was interested in you. I learned this week that every trash day he got up early in the morning and greeted the trash men. They in turn would bring the trashcan back to house. He touched all of our lives in so many ways.

Pa served the church faithfully. He was a Sunday school teacher, an Elder and finally keeper of the church. I am astounded at the number of Sunday school students that Pa taught. If you haven’t had Pa as a Sunday school teacher you are probably in a minority. I have heard on several occasions that Granny and Pa call their faith a “quiet” faith. They did a poor job of keeping it quiet. While they didn’t talk loudly about the Lord, they loved people like Jesus loves people. Pa passed his faith on to many, many generations.

As the four grandchildren talked we all agreed that Pa was the best grandfather. We all have fond memories of him coming to ALL of our events, tee-ball, soccer, baseball, plays, concerts. The four of us remember being chased with foo-foo and then going to church smelling of Old Spice. Pa taught us a number of things, how to turn on a light switch, how to march, how to run the trains, how to hit crab apples with a bat, how to garden, how to jump in the waves, and how to patiently let the waves bury your feet in the sand, sometimes we weren’t so patient. He didn’t just play with us as children he remained interested in us as teenagers and then adults. We all have received mailings of newspaper clippings and other things that he knew would interest us. We will miss seeing his scratchy handwriting looking out at us from the mailbox. As teenagers, without prompting from our parents, we would drop by to see Granny and Pa, the boys usually came for food, but we all came for the company. We gladly shared our lives with Granny and Pa. After getting engaged I stopped to tell them before telling my parents. I always knew that no matter what I did that Granny and Pa were faithful and I knew that they were praying for me. This above all else is the best gift that they could have given us.

Pa was also a great-grand father, he was affectionately named Ol’ Pa by Sam, a name that Pa gratefully accepted. Just a few weeks ago he was on the floor playing trains with Sam. Sam, your job is to tell the other great grand children about their Ol’ Pa.

For all of the things that were good about Pa, there were a few things that were, well, as we say “Just Pa.” I am sorry if you were ever his pastor, because I know that he gave you a really hard time each week about the hymns that you chose for the Sunday service. If it wasn’t that than it was why your sermon wasn’t really that great. We were joking that he really did lack a filter between his brain and his mouth, because if he thought it then he said it. I remember that after having a baby Pa told me that I was getting “solid.” Aunt Judy told us how he once said that she was looking, “mature.” He had a habit of “telling it like it is” and if you didn’t want to hear it. . . well, then, you didn’t have a choice.

I couldn’t sleep on Thursday night I was awake well into Friday morning. I knew that my grandfather, after 88 years, was going Home soon. I didn’t know that he was already there. It was really odd for me, I was sad that he was going to die and that I would miss him but, I was excited for him too. I was excited that he was going to start the next journey of his life. I kept thinking about what his face would look like as he took his last breath here and took his next breath in Heaven. I thought about who would greet him first, probably his mother. I saw his friends and family rejoicing at his arrival. I thought about how he would know everything all at once. How he would see all of the seeds of faith that he help to plant. I saw my Pa walking on strong legs, his eyes clearly fixed on the Lord, and how Jesus looked on him and said, “Well done, good and faithful servant, well done” and my Pa heard Him.

Make It Count

2008-07-31T20:52:00.008-04:00

A couple of posts ago, we wrote about a weekend where we were able to see our whole family and how rare that is for us. This past weekend we said goodbye to our grandfather, Pa. Whatever it was that caused his death, it came and went quickly. He went to be with the Lord only a few short days after everyone realized something was wrong. Family is a special thing and we have been mightily blessed by our family.

Things I will probably never forget -

My wife speaking for the family about Pa at the funeral service. We will try to post what she said later. It was perfect.
A pair of marines folding a flag and presenting it to Amy's Granny. This was a powerful image.
Pa.

Clothes and a suitcase

2008-07-24T09:14:00.009-04:00

If you know me, than you know that I love to shop at Goodwill. I think that it embarrasses my husband to some extent, but I love finding a really good deal. Over the years I have gotten some pretty awesome things there. Who could forget the 20 dollar rocking chair? I had to refinish it, but it is pretty awesome.

Well, I was there the other day, I don't go often in the summer because Sam is convinced that he is allergic to shopping, there was a ton of little boy overalls waiting for me in the 75 cent bin.

(Since we didn't request a boy or a girl we will most likely get a boy. For some reason more people tend to request girls, I think it is because they have cute clothes. It is very rare to get a girl when you don't specify the gender of the baby. I knew that I was ready to adopt when I didn't care if we got a boy or girl. I thought that having a girl would be ideal, her and Lucy could share a room, and we have an amazing amount of girl clothes.)

So, back to Goodwill, there were eight pairs of overalls for boys. Each were .75 cents! I bought four pairs, two shirts and a cute pair of Nike shorts (so our new boy can look like R.W.) the whole lot cost 6 dollars. The brown overalls are Janie and Jack! Seriously, who in Elkton wears Janie and Jack?

Now on to the best deal . . .

The suitcase was 0 dollars and no cents. We just went dumpster diving. It is obvious that Lucy loves it.

Weekend

2008-07-21T20:41:00.006-04:00

Saturday -
0630 - Wake up
0700 - YMCA - basically stand on elliptical for 40 minutes
0800 - Go with Amy and Lucy to a morning meeting
0900 - Go to breakfast with Lucy
0900 - Amy goes to breakfast with ladies from church
0945 - Take a walk with Lucy down Main Street in Newark
1000 - Amy Lucy and I depart Newark
1100 - Amy is getting ready for weekend (packing, etc)
1100 - I am laying on couch like I cannot move
1130 - I finally get off couch and pack some clothes
1142 - We leave for birthday party at 1200 that is 60 minutes away
1230 - Arrive at Kayla's (my niece) ninth birthday party
1230 - 1510 - Celebrate wildly at lavish outdoor pool complex
1615 - Arrive at Granny and Pa's to visit. Pa is in his final days. He has been an inspiration to many
1645 - Leave Granny and Pa's
1730 - Arrive at Mom and Dad's (Amy's parents)
1730 - 1745 - Gleefully greet everyone and visit with Amy's parents and her brother and his wife and their kids.
1800 - Men leave for 'Batman'
1800 - 2230 - Women do everything that needs to be done for tomorrow's baby shower
2230 - Men return and notice nothing
2300 - Crash hard

Sunday
0630 - Dreaming about waking up, but resist the urge
0800 - Amy gets up, I think
0930 - I arise and greet the world
1000 - 1400 - More party preparation
1000 - 1300 - I try to help but I am just not very good at this kind of stuff
1300 - 1400 - I take my position on the couch and relax
1500 - Guests arrive
1530 - I leave the party with Samuel as the shower is only for the ladyfolk
1615 - Samuel and I dine at one of my favorite restaurants near Amy's parents
1715 - Samuel and I stop by another restaurant to have dessert
1740 - We arrive back at the shower. It is still going on.
1745 - I consume all of the meat kabobs that were left over
1830 - Most non-residing party guests are gone
1845 - Family relaxes and chats
1900 - I go upstairs to pack, but end up just laying on the bed
1945 - We leave for home
2120 - We arrive at home
2120 - 2300 - I watch the ESPYs
2300 - I go to bed while Amy is reading

My learning's from the weekend are as follows -

Spending time with my immediate family makes me really happy. I love them and I do not get very much alone time with them, but this weekend I got to spend alone time with both of my kids and it was great. I also got to talk with Amy on several occasions and she inspires me.

Having a legacy of faith is awesome. Amy's grandfather, Pa, will be remembered as a Christian man. Both of my grandfathers died before I was born, so I did not see this in my family, but Amy's family has such a legacy of enduring faith. It is inspirational and now we pray that this legacy will start anew the flame in those who's light has grown dim. Thank you Pa for living the way you have and may God grant you eternal peace.

Lastly, even though it is often inconvenient and difficult, it is great to be with our extended family. This weekend we got to see our aunts, our uncles, our cousins, our siblings, our parents and our grandparents. This does not happen very often so it was pretty special. I feel blessed to be part of our families and I thank God for them.

Meanderings on Waiting . . .

2008-07-18T23:48:00.006-04:00

Hi! This is Amy . . . William said that more people would read if I wrote here. Sorry, this post isn't very light hearted.

I was out with a friend last night and we were talking about the adoption "wait." I went through the usual, we have about 8 more months of waiting (sorry Erin) and we are really excited. Then I went on to say that I wasn't sure if the excited part was true or not. I am excited to have a new baby, and I am excited that we are going to experience the amazing gift of adopting. But I keep thinking about what it would mean to get a referral (that means a child assigned to you.) It would mean that a mother and father are potentially dead, or a grandmother had to make the difficult descion, "I can't take this one," or maybe the baby woke up on the side of the road.
As a parent, one of my worst fears is dying and leaving my children. (Please don't comment and tell me that I would be better off or that the Lord would care for them, I know.) It is hard not to think about what our child will have to go through to get to us. . In some ways I wish that he/she wouldn't have to experience loss or grief or sorrow, but then he/she would not belong to us. I am not at the point where I can rejoice at referral time.
I know that the Lord provides joy in the time of sorrow, I have experienced it.

A Fun Evening!

2008-07-17T22:30:00.002-04:00

So today I knew Amy was suppose to go out with a friend to dinner. I was suppose to get home from work early to ensure they could get out of the house relatively early. Unfortunately, I was later than expected. As always, Amy was very gracious about my lateness/job, but nonetheless, I felt bad about being late. So the evening did not start in a great place for me.

I am home with Lucy and we are trying to figure out what to do. I asked Lucy if she already ate dinner and she said that she had noodles. So my ideas about going out on a date with my two year old were thwarted. Instead Lucy suggested that we watch The Incredibles. This sounded great, so off to the living room we went. I started the movie and we snuggled. Lucy fell asleep on my chest as we were laying down and I also drifted off for a very pleasant nap. I was suddenly jarred awake by Lucy's excitement. She said, "Daddy, look - Incredibles". I laughed and we finished watching the movie. After the movie I took Lucy up to bed and we read and prayed together and she was off to sleep. This was a really sweet time with my daughter.

When Amy got home she asked how Lucy was and I told her she was great and we had a fun time together. Then she asked what we had for dinner. I told Amy that Lucy said she had noodles. Amy then informed me that Lucy ate noodles for lunch around noon. So, I had a great time with Lucy, but it turns out that I am a lousy father sometimes. I will try to be better tomorrow.

Do you remember?

2008-07-16T14:34:00.002-04:00

Well, during this adoption waiting period, there is not always a ton of things to write. So, I think it would be a good idea to write about what is important. Things we dream about, things we enjoy or things that we remember with fondness from the past.

I was just looking at a picture of my wife and it brought to my attention two moments in my life that mean just about as much as anything could mean to a person.

The first moment occurred October 27, 1995. I was at a camp with my christian fellowship from the University of Maryland. We were in the first session of the night and a group from another college showed up a little late and clamoured into the room. I was distracted by the noise, but then I became distracted by far more. Up against the wall and under a light was a beautiful young lady. I am still not sure if she was shining or if there was a light over her head, but either way she looked radiant. I knew I had to meet her.

The second moment occurred March 6, 1999. I was in Annapolis, Maryland and I was standing in front of a church. I looked and I could not move. My eyes were fixed on this girl who appeared to be shining. This time I was sure there was no man made light involved.

There have been many special times in my life, but there are some that I want to make sure to never forget. I want to place them in my mind when things look grey or when I just want to smile.

Lord, help me to remember all of the things you have done in my life that have made it worth living. Thank you for giving me Amy and thank you for the life that you have provided for us. You are an awesome God.

How did we get here?

2008-07-13T23:08:00.000-04:00

Since there may be some who read this blog that do not know the Stackler's, we have included a small slideshow below. The slides will take you through the past six + years of our life. The pictures are focused mostly around our children and our time with them.

Lord thank you for your provision in our lives. You have always provided our every physical, emotional, spiritual, etc need. You know our needs and you have proven yourself faithful time after time. Lord, we pray that we would be as faithful with what you have entrusted us with. Our spouses, our children, our families, our jobs, our finances, our time, our church, our friends. Teach us to listen to You and then to act for You. Help us to reach out and be bold. Thank you for saving us.

Brothers make the world go round!

2008-07-12T21:40:00.000-04:00

Our six year old, Samuel, has gone on holiday to visit his grandparents. This has not made his sister very happy. Lucy has been mildly devastated given that her best friend/brother will not be around for a couple of days. So, in an attempt to comfort our devastated little one, we journeyed across the cul-de-sac to play with our neighbors.

A short aside about our neighborhood and how much God knows. Amy and I moved from our previous home a little more than two years ago. We wanted to find a home that offered a good place for our children to grow up. We wanted that old-fashioned neighborhood where everyone just hangs out in the evenings and all of the kids play. We found just that, so bravo to the Lord for His provision. You thought that was it. Oh no! Amy and I had also been thinking about adopting once Lucy was about two years old. Not only do our immediate neighbors have children the same age as our Samuel, they are all adopted, two little girls from South Korea and one from Ukraine. We saw this as a strong confirmation for us to adopt. We are so thankful for our neighborhood, but most thankful to our God for knowing our needs and providing for them perfectly.

Now back to the story. Lucy had a great time with the neighbors, but it was getting late and it was bedtime. We had to say good-bye to our friends and come home. Lucy looked up in the sky and saw the moon. There is probably nothing sweeter than the way a two-year old talks. "Look mommydaddy, da moon." She follow-up her observation with an even more startling claim. "Brother turned in on for me." Even with her brother gone to visit the grandparents, she knew that he missed her and wanted to let her know that he loves her. Children are amazing and I regularly want to be more like them.

Lord, teach us to believe like our children. Teach us to get all of our baggage out of the way and see what you are doing. Teach us to imagine, to dream, to hope and to believe. You have overcome the world and you have given us a great inheritance. Let us not live beneath what you died to provide. You alone are great and worthy to be praised.

1000 to 1

2008-07-11T10:16:00.001-04:00

The most recent estimates that I have heard put the number of orphans in Ethiopia around 5 million. I believe there are less than 5000 adoptions a year from Ethiopia. This means that there are at least 1000 orphans left behind for every one that is adopted. We are going to adopt one Ethiopian child in the near future and I am having a hard time imaging being in Addis, driving through the streets and leaving with just one. Obviously, I cannot take all 5 million home, but can I help all 5 million? I believe the answer is yes and it is by not forgetting them. Adoption is obviously not the solution for these children in Ethiopia (or anywhere else in the world), even though it is making so many of our dreams come true. We must be willing to ask God what he would have us do. Orphans and widows have a special place in God’s heart, and they should have the same place in ours.

I am looking forward with great anticipation to our travel to Ethiopia and our journey home. I am also looking forward to being challenged by God to not forget those in need. To me it sounds like the parable of the lost sheep, but in reverse. There is one that is going to be taken care of and 99(9) that are in need of the shepherds care.

Lord, I pray that you continue to take care of all of your children. I praise you that you are using adoption to expand so many families. Bless all those who are in the process of bringing these children home. Lord, challenge us to continue to pray for the children around the world that we did not adopt. May your mercy cover over them and us.

Names

2008-07-09T16:14:00.001-04:00

Amy and I have always liked names with meanings. I know that all names have meaning, but we have elected to name our children with some amount of attention paid to what their names mean and not just what they sound like. Our oldest, Samuel, was born after we struggled to have a child for several years. His name means ‘God heard’ or ‘Asked of God’. Next we had Georgia Irene; her name means Farmer of Peace. Georgia was an idyllic peaceful child. Next, we had Lucy and her names means ‘bearer of light’. Lucy has brought our family so much light in her nearly three years.

So we come to our next child. We don’t know if they will be a boy or a girl. But we are thinking it will probably be a boy for a number of reasons, mostly because we have had a boy name since before Lucy was born. The name is Kaleb. Amy and I were discussing what we would name Lucy before we knew she was a girl. When talking about boy names we arrived at the same name without ever talking to each other about the name. There has never been a question that Kaleb would be the name of one of our children. The biblical Caleb saw with God’s eyes. He was not blind, he saw the giants. Instead of running in fear, he believed in what God had promised.

My prayer -
Lord, help us to be like Caleb. We all have giants in our lives that look undefeatable. You have overcome the world and you have defeated our enemies. Give us the courage to place our faith in your victory. Teach us to walk in boldness and live with peace. I pray especially for the orphaned children of the world, that you would help them to defeat the giants in their lives. Help them to trust in you and believe your promises. Rescue us all from our unbelief.

The Beginning . . .

2008-07-08T07:47:00.000-04:00

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Jeremiah 29:11

This verse is quite familiar and like many who have gone before us, it means a great deal to our adoption story. Let me take you back to the day it entered our story.

Easter started off with great promise, the Stackler’s rose early in the morning to get ready to go to church to celebrate the Lord’s resurrection. While making ourselves ready our daughter, Georgia Irene, stopped breathing. The paramedics responded quickly and she was rushed to the hospital, but it was too late. Our beautiful baby girl died on that day, the very same day that we celebrate the Lord’s victory over death. Before we left the hospital, we had an opportunity to spend some time with Georgia, and Amy heard a curious thing from the Lord. She heard the above verse from Jeremiah. She was confused. “Lord, what do you mean ‘hope and a future’, she’s gone? The Lord spoke clearly, the verse was not about Georgia, it was about us.

In addition to Georgia, we have been blessed with two other children. After our youngest was born a couple of years ago, it was clear to us that Amy getting pregnant was an undesirable avenue to further increase our family. We prayed and agreed to adopt. Our search for an agency was very brief. We watched a promotional video from our agency and written across the screen was the verse from Jeremiah. It’s a common verse and it may be in every promotional video from every Christian agency, but it felt to us like God had given us direction.

Our prayer today is for the orphan’s around the world –
Lord, may the words of Jeremiah ring true in all of our hearts. Help us not to view the circumstances in our lives as unmovable barriers, but rather as opportunities to trust in You. Care for the children who need your help today and encourage them to dream dream’s filled with hope. Encourage those who are able, to reach out into world and care for these children.